:) Whats the dumbest thing you've heard :)

[hgallegos915]

Yeah HAHA i saw it on youtube LOL


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNVrMZX2kms

[tehbrookzorz]

Okay, I've got a new one.

My friend came into work the other day with a worried expression on his face, looking for advice. "Umm.. Is it normal for my car NOT to start in Drive?" Turns out his 87 Honda Accord had stalled on him in a main intersection while he was doing errands around town. He'd been having issues with the car recently so he thought it had finally given up altogether. Panicking, he repeatedly tried starting it, still in drive, to no avail. Helplessly he got out and opened the hood grasping for some sign of what might be wrong. So long story short, he held up traffic for about 5 minutes because his car wouldn't start in 'D'.

[MazdaManiacMx3]

Well , when I started college , I saw a kid driving a 240sx to school one day , so I initiated coversation with him about his car , I asked him what he had done to it , he responded an intake and he bought an exhaust but didn't put it on yet . I asked him hey is it a stick , he responded no , well the conversation went downhill from there . I said well I probrably wouldn't put an exhaust on then , they sound like crap on a auto , Que the stupid so he responded well I know but this exhaust adds 60hp. I immediately said no .. Just No .. nothing ekse , he ranted back , yes it does my brother is a mechanic they have a special way of bending the exhaust and im going to take the cat off and put a high flow muffler on . It's what they do to racecars ..
My only response was no . Some other kid overheard and pretty much shut him down .
Til' this day he still sticks to his explanation on his theory ,
That someone put too small of an exhaust on the car 1 3/4" and he bumped it up to 2 1/4 so to contradict the power loss , and the added horsepower gained he got 60hp .
My only response to him when he says that is no maybe 6 .
Hes a bafoon .
End of story

[2RotorsNaDream]

Not even 6

[Audessy]

Okay, I need to get in on this.

So, my co-worker is putting tires away and notices in the parking lot that these two chics are standing there with a washer fluid bottle just completely baffled. He decides to go over there and assist (PS he's really geeky looking). Apparently he told them that if they ever need help again filling the washer fluid again that they should come back because he's the best washer fluid filler in town.

"A turbo timer adds 15 WHP!"

A guy I was training to be a lube tech asked if we were supposed to fill the differential and transfer case. The car was a Pontiac Grand Am.

"Why isn't this lug nut coming off?" I reply "Because the f***ing gun is over torquing it you dolt!"

A guy wanted to check the oil level Pontiac Fiero. He opened the front compartment and went OMG!

I also heard of a guy accidentally filling the crank case with washer fluid. WOOPS!

[MazdaManiacMx3]

Not even 6

Yeah I know that , I just tell him that so he shuts up ..

[Flyer]

Buddy and I came out of a MR2 meet, was going away from Pacific Mall. Cops pulled us over for having a cover on the plates. My friend was taking off the covers when one of the cops put his hand over the hood of the car and goes, "Son, you hood feels a bit hot. Have you been racing?" We pop open the hood revealing the spare tire engine of doom...

[Audessy]

[quote="Flyer"]Buddy and I came out of a MR2 meet, was going away from Pacific Mall. Cops pulled us over for having a cover on the plates. My friend was taking off the covers when one of the cops put his hand over the hood of the car and goes, "Son, you hood feels a bit hot. Have you been racing?" We pop open the hood revealing the spare tire engine of doom...[/quote]


LMFAO!!!!

[tehbrookzorz]

Cops for the win!

[fowljesse]

Here's a stupid thing I almost said (Thank God for the quick scan between brain and mouth): When I went to look at my MX-3 on the lot, I thought it was 4 cyl (per advertisement). I opened the hood, and since the rear bank is covered up, I was looking for the other cyl.! I've seen engines that are V configured odd numbers.... Luckily, I'm just smart enough to look at the disty before asking where the other cylinder is! I guess part of the reason I got such a good deal is that the dealer didn't know it was a 6.

[glow]

I am at the Honda/Mazda Dealership talking to the idiot at the counter.

"We dont have...mechanics..that work on imports here..."

that's awesome! lol

[neli_nael]

wow mustve took you a long time to dig this up, but very entertaining

[tmac4t4]

lol this threads awsome
recently, i met this guy who owns a civic, we were talking and he mentioned he had a turbo. me being curious asked him to pop the hood so i could check out his set-up..i looked at his engine bay, then looked at him, and asked where his turbo was.((there was no turbo))..he wasnt sure, but he knew he had it,so for amusement purposes i let him spend a few minutes lookin over his engine bay trying to find his turbo ..after all he did have the "turbo" sticker on the trunk
i couldnt make this up if i tried

[hotsiit]

A couple weeks back, an older gentleman came into the shop raising up a storm, saying our customers are always drag racing around the area at night (We close at 6pm and over half of the cars are there for motor work and do not run), we are too loud (dyno) etc...but the best was, he said "I am going to Harrisburg to get you shut down for adding illegal horsepowers to these cars!"
...Have not heard back

[Savin]

This is not car related, but I must share.

A guy walked into Lowes a while back and went up to one of the workers and said, "I need a tool for this 'thing'." (its a screw) The guy 'looked' smart BTW...
Worker: Do you know what kind of tool you want for it? Drill, etc?
Guy: I just need the tool for it.
Worker: What is it you're holding, flathead, phillips, torques?
Guy: What are those?
Worker: Types of screws.....
Guy: what are screws?
Worker: (at this point he was getting pretty PO'd) The thing you're holding! *looks at screw* OK sir, you need a phillips screwdriver for that screw. Follow me.

there was also a guy that was arguing with a worker saying he needed a 2x4 and the worker kept handing him a "1 1/2 x 3 1/2" (actual size of 2x4) The guy actually had a tape measure and measured the wood.....

Now onto car stories:
A buddy of mine decided to take off his valve covers and paint EVERYTHING in his engine bay Grabber Green. So the inside of his heads were green now, covered in paint. I'm not sure if he painted the valve covers or not. It was a red '95 mustang 5.0.

My brother's friend just bought some 20in rims or something (I can't remember). He wanted to see what they looked like on my brother's old T-bird. They go to put it on and realize the 5 lug bolt pattern isn't the same. That did not stop them though, lol. They hit it on with a mallet. After they put it on, they realized it looked ugly and wanted to take it off. That wasn't going to happen too easily. They got fed up with tugging on it, so they wrapped a chain around the rim and pulled it off with my brother's mx-6. The rim landed face down and scraped the ground. I think my brother's friend cried a little when that happened.
Those aren't the dumbest things I've heard, but they are stupid, lol.