:) Whats the dumbest thing you've heard :)

[Vanished]

I was talking to my friend about cars the other day and he said that his teacher had an interceptor and "if he put headers on it, it would have illegal amount of horsepower...like 500 or somethin"

then i said "dude, you mean after market headers right?"

and he said "no, i mean JUST headers..intercpeters dont' have headers"

wow what an IDIOT but it was funny...same guy also said that when you get bigger rimes you go faster cuz your wheels are bigger.

[Vanished]

Oh yah, and my friend once mistaked a new vet for a mustang lol...

[Juans_93_MX3]

A friend of mine has a 2000 Potiac Sunfire and the other day he was bragging about how he is going to get a Turbo
I ask him if its going to be custom or just a turbo kit. He says both (lol)
I later asked him if he was going to get a BOV, wastegate, turbo exhaust manifold and fuel injectors.
He says, "nah, you dont need that stuff".

He's got alot to learn that I will have to teach him

[Vanished]

Yah that sounds like my friend loL...some peoples non-gear headed kids these days...

[Juans_93_MX3]

Originally posted by Vanshed:
Yah that sounds like my friend loL...some peoples non-gear headed kids these days...

lol
I bet if I ask the friend of mine where the turbo goes he will probably say, "somewhere in the engine by the pistons".

[manowar821]

This is from my buddies at work (they are into Honda... ONLY Honda.)
They were telling me that if I REALLY want to get somewhere, I should sell my car and get a Honda of some sort.. And that the ONLY good Mazda ever made was the rx-7... And only the latest rx-7.
Here it is though.

Me: "I don't think I agree with you, if I spend enough time and really put effort into it, my car will be just as fast as a Honda with around the same amount of time put into it."

Chi: "No, Mazda's are slow, get a Honda. You want me to be honest with you? Your car slow... You can put 10k into it, and it still slow."

Don't get me wrong, these guys are fun to be around, nice people. But man, come on... Even the sohc isn't THAT SLOW. As long as you know what to do to it...
What if I dropped a BP into it?
Well, these guys will tell you to not waste your time or money on it. And to get a Honda.
I guess this isn't a DUMB thing, its an ignorance thing. Nothing wrong with that.. But still funny.

:p

[neutral]

A friend, a brilliant network engineer in fact, tells me that he just bought a brand new Mustang. Surprising because I know he's not a car enthusiast by any stretch and has driven a Volvo or Ford Taurus since I've known him. Now that he was turning 40, I guess he needed to buy this red stang? But I digress. We had a conversation at work one day that went like this...

Hey! I just bought a new Mustang so let's take a drive at lunch.
Wow! I'm impressed and a little surprised. What size is the engine?
Ummm... I'm not sure...
Well, is it a 6 cylinder or 8 cylinder engine?
Hmmm... I really don't know... yet...
Didn't you look under the hood at the showroom?
Yes of course!
And....what did you see?
Uhh, an engine. I didn't really know what to look for. How would you tell?
oooohhkaaaay... let's try this a different way. Is it the GT model?
I...think it is.
Paul, you really are an idiot about cars aren't you?
Yes but I really like this car a lot.
Paul, you are just too ignorant to be allowed to own a new Mustang. Give me the keys.
No.

p.s. it was a brand new GT and under my intense technical instruction at lunchtime, Paul can now count the cylinders...

[Tunes67]

Dumbest thing I have ever heard eh? Ok.. well this is a second hand story from a buddy of mine from way back.. he used to work in the automotive department at sears. They had a return customer that had bought a new set of tires from them 6 months prior to this incident. (By the way.. I have no way of knowing how true or embellished this story is.. but its still funny)

This lady returns 6 months after buying a new set of tires and complains that her car has a weird vibration coming from the front end of the car. So my buddy Keith books the car in and they check it out completely. They find a worn idler arm in the suspension and replace it.. but that is all they can find wrong with the car and before they worked on it.. Keith didnt feel anything wrong in the prelim test drive. After the idler arm was replaced Keith still didnt feel any kind of vibration So the lady comes and picks it up, 2 days later she is back complaining about the vibration again. Now Keith has driven this car 3 times now and cant hear or feel anything wrong with it.. and he is having a heck of a time trying to explain to this lady that there is nothing wrong with the car.. she doesnt understand anything about cars and according to Keith.. wasnt the brightest bulb in the bunch to begin with. So after having the car in the shop for a week and having several techs go over the car with a fine tooth comb.. Keith tells the Lady he has finally found the problem.. He is joking when he says this.. but she took him as being dead serious.

Keith: We finally found the problem ma'am. Apparently you havent changed out the air in your tires. When you bought the tires in december they were inflated with "winter" air, now that we are in June, we replaced the "winter" air with "Summer" air and now your car rides as smooth as silk.

Lady: Who would have thought it could be something so simple? Was that expensive to do? How often do I need to change the air in my tires?

Now Keith was a nice guy and they didnt charge her anything.. They went on a test drive with her (first time that Keith had been in the car with her when she drove it) and the Lady complimented Keith and thanked him for a excellent job well done. Apparently her car had never driven or performed that well ever before. She left a happy customer. Now Keith left for school a few months later.. and we never did find out if she came back for a winter air change.. but we still laugh about it

Tunes67

[93SOHC]

Dear GOD, that is hillarious!!!

[matt-gerrard]

i don't know if everyone has seen mischeif 3000 but its the part with the black guy an the mustang. rice decals, he said it had a rotary engine in it...yea thats pretty bad.

i got that vid',...we gave you guys Micheal Jackson..you all can have the mustang guy also..... GT R 'stang w/rotary...lol

[reaper of souls]

let's see stupidest thing i heard was the moron across the street say that because he now has the v-tec under his honda he can out run and race my old mans 69 gto judge. all i could do was look at him like a deer in the headlights then i fell to the ground beacuse my stomach was killing from laughing too hard!! also his idoit brother did the stupidest thing ever he put 20's on his 04 chevy colorado . first off his running with a 30 series tread there too wide and stick out of the wheel wells about a good 2 inches and are the compleatly wrong offset and are now fu**ing up his computer on the truck.


also the rims are BSA's and are crome painted NOT dipped

[schuttie2002]

this is a good thread, and I'm glad it was brought back around. The funniest thing/dumbest thing I've heard was from this girl whose parents spent so much money on her car to make it look good and therefore she thought she knew some things about cars. well one day I'm sitting there asking her if she bought anything new for it and she replies:
No I havnt been buying things for it lately, but I have been learning all about it lately. I got this really neat idea and im surpirsed no one thought about it yet. I'm going to take apart my dash and tape the gas needle to full, this way i never have to fill up with gas again. Great idea right?

at this point i couldnt help myself and just walked away laughing.

[Chiggles]

Dumbest statement lately: about 4 days ago at work, myself and another associate were checking out this RSX-S that a customer pulled up with. Just a quick glance to see what it had - Spoon calipers, custom pods, a few riced out decals, etc. Then another guy from work comes out to check it out with us and goes "why does it have Honda and Integra emblems on the back?" And we go, "Well, it's pretty obvious that he's going for a JDM look". Then he goes, "What's JDM?" I walked back into the store laughing my a-- off.

Dumbest things I've head while at work (which is Future Shop, BTW). A lady comes into the store one day and asks me where all my "mini-cam things" are cuz she's going overseas to Turkey or something like that in a few days for some sort of conference but needs to tape these meetings of her secretly. Looking a little puzzled I say "Ok, well, the smallest webcam I can get you would be something like this but I'm sure that we'll be pretty obvious still". She asks, "Well of course it's too big, don't you have anymore of those cameras that are on the end of those bendable wires so that I can put that through this (she says as she points to some hole on her briefcase the size of a pea. I chuckled, "No Ms., we don't carry anything like that here." Her reply, "What do you mean you don't have this here? You guys are Future Shop, you're supposed to carry EVERY sort of gadget!!" I suggested that she try maybe talking to someone at the military garrison or the air base just north of town and that maybe she could get a lead on something like that from them. She wasn't pleased.

Most memorable customer I've ever met while I've been working there, a few years ago, this guy comes into the store explaining that he just lost his Palm Pilot not that long ago, but that it's critical that he somehow gets it back cuz of all the contacts, information, etc. that he has stored in the little unit. He picks up this software program (Microsoft Streets and Trips) which is supposed to be used as a reference mapping program so that you can find how to get yourself from one place to another, right. This guy asks me "Since my Palm has the same synchronizing program installed into it as the one on my laptop, is it possible for me to install this Streets and Trips thing too and merge these 2 programs together somehow so that I can track down my Palm Pilot like a GPS sort of thing?" ....... I didn't want to hurt his feelings by laughing my a-- off, so I was surprised how calm I was when I let him down gently by telling him, "Well, it might be possible, but the range on the transmitters would be of such short range that you'd never be able to get a fix on it." He goes, "Even if I drive around in my car with the laptop on, I still wouldn't be able to find it?" I go, "No, probably not. You know how when you swap files between 2 PDAs that they have to line up the infrared port together right? It's the same sort of range." He was pretty disappointed too.

[Tunes67]

Heh.. your nicer than me Chiggles.. I would have told him that it would work like a charm.. just the thought of the guy driving all over town trying to track down his PDA just cracks me up LOL

I do have one other "Dumb" story to share though.. This one involved one of my brothers Girlfriends.. It was the day before thanksgiving and we were having a pretty wild windstorm here. My brother, myself and his GF were at my parents house helping setup for thanksgiving. We are all sitting in the living room having finished up getting the card tables setup when all of a sudden the power goes out. My brothers GF jumps to her feet and runs into the bathroom and flushes the toilet.. then re-emerges from the bathroom and exclaims "Well at least the toilet is still working!" I stared at her for at least 2 minutes.. hoping.. praying that there was some sort of punchline coming.. but no.. she just had this stupid smug looking smile on her face .. I couldnt contain myself any longer and I exclaimed.. "WELL DUH!!!! Toilets operate off of water pressure not electricity!" My brother lost it.. couldnt stop laughing.. (they broke up 2 weeks later) Now I do realize that there are houses that run on well water and that the pumps for these wells do require electricity to operate.. and to be honest.. I dont know if thats what she meant or not.. she never did try to explain.. she just blushed and stared at the ceiling after I pointed that out to her. And yes.. for all those that are wondering.. she was indeed blonde. (Not that I believe all dumbs are blondes )

Tunes67

[freyguy_412]

Worked for Ace Hardware, and had Car Quest auto parts in the back. Hangin out with them one day, a woman cam in complaining that one turn signal was blinkin faster than the other. We walked out to her car, she showed us, and we popped her hood. Pointed to her windshield washer tank and told her she getting low on blinker fluid. She agreed, "oh that's what I thought." We told her we were all out of the blinker fluid and she would need to go to AutoZone up the street. She thanked us and took off.


From a TransAm owner, who claimed it was supercharged and had to have a wastegate hooked up b/c the turbo lag was intense, " I'm Boosting 4 PSI just idleing here!" Found out later that in reality all he did was hook up a boost guage to a vacume line, or something. Whatever he hooked it up to it was "boosting" almost 5 PSI at an idle.